Crazy about the boy you are dating and want to make things better? Take it from us—tips and tricks to keep you on your toes, and ensure you get good lovin'.
SEEING EACH OTHER
1. Don't sleep with a guy on the first date if you want the best shot at a future with him. You risk being put into the onenight-stand category.
2. When a man tells you he isn't looking 'for commitment', repeat it to a friend. This will force you to accept he means it.
3. Never pretend to be into his hobbies. Your true colours will come out.
4. Enjoy the moment when you're on a date — that means no worrying if he's The One by date four. Just have fun!
5. Spend equal — if not more — time with your friends in the first few months of dating. Guys often rush into a relationship, then suddenly cry, "This is moving too fast!" You have to apply the brakes.
6. Keep things light for at least three months before deciding to progress to a serious relationship. You need a minimum of 90 days to even begin to know what someone is really like.
1. Don't sleep with a guy on the first date if you want the best shot at a future with him. You risk being put into the onenight-stand category.
2. When a man tells you he isn't looking 'for commitment', repeat it to a friend. This will force you to accept he means it.
3. Never pretend to be into his hobbies. Your true colours will come out.
4. Enjoy the moment when you're on a date — that means no worrying if he's The One by date four. Just have fun!
5. Spend equal — if not more — time with your friends in the first few months of dating. Guys often rush into a relationship, then suddenly cry, "This is moving too fast!" You have to apply the brakes.
6. Keep things light for at least three months before deciding to progress to a serious relationship. You need a minimum of 90 days to even begin to know what someone is really like.
GOING TO THE NEXT LEVEL
7. He's not your "boyfriend" until he publicly calls you his "girlfriend", or you've agreed not to see other people.
8. When you have a problem with his lifestyle, speak up before you get mad. If you don't tell him that his partying is bothering you, you'll eventually explode.
9. If you need to have the "defining the relationship talk", initiate it while you're walking. Low-key activity lowers his stresshormone levels, which rise when he's forced to talk about his emotions.
10. Hang out with happy couples he knows and thinks are cool. When he sees commitment as a fun thing, he'll be more comfortable with it.
11. Shacking up before getting (really) serious is not a bad move at all — we recommend it. Living together presents a host of new challenges, troubles, and situations that are best handled before you both decide to get married.
12. Deliver an ultimatum to get a commitment only if you're prepared to walk away. Be firm about expectations, and give him a deadline.
13. You can't force a man to cut ties with his past, but do explain why his hanging out with an ex or a dodgy friend hurts you. If he really cares, he'll respect your wishes or tell you why he needs continued contact.
HITTING THE FIRST ROUGH PATCH
14. Develop binocular vision — the ability to see his perspective, as well as your own. Try to appreciate his point of view and he'll be more likely to appreciate yours.
15. Combine a complaint with a compliment: "You're working so hard, but call me if you'll be home late, so I can make other plans."
16. Get him to act by using humour. Point out a pile of wet towels and joke, "Nothing like coming home to the smell of post-gym sweat!"
17. Be specific about that birthday present you'd like or the restaurant you want to go to. Men don't always get it when we're trying to be subtle.
18. If you find out he's done something JLO bad in the past — like cheated on an ex-girlfriend — ask him why he did it and what he learnt from it. If he's contrite and has vowed to change, chances are he won't do it again.
7. He's not your "boyfriend" until he publicly calls you his "girlfriend", or you've agreed not to see other people.
8. When you have a problem with his lifestyle, speak up before you get mad. If you don't tell him that his partying is bothering you, you'll eventually explode.
9. If you need to have the "defining the relationship talk", initiate it while you're walking. Low-key activity lowers his stresshormone levels, which rise when he's forced to talk about his emotions.
10. Hang out with happy couples he knows and thinks are cool. When he sees commitment as a fun thing, he'll be more comfortable with it.
11. Shacking up before getting (really) serious is not a bad move at all — we recommend it. Living together presents a host of new challenges, troubles, and situations that are best handled before you both decide to get married.
12. Deliver an ultimatum to get a commitment only if you're prepared to walk away. Be firm about expectations, and give him a deadline.
13. You can't force a man to cut ties with his past, but do explain why his hanging out with an ex or a dodgy friend hurts you. If he really cares, he'll respect your wishes or tell you why he needs continued contact.
HITTING THE FIRST ROUGH PATCH
14. Develop binocular vision — the ability to see his perspective, as well as your own. Try to appreciate his point of view and he'll be more likely to appreciate yours.
15. Combine a complaint with a compliment: "You're working so hard, but call me if you'll be home late, so I can make other plans."
16. Get him to act by using humour. Point out a pile of wet towels and joke, "Nothing like coming home to the smell of post-gym sweat!"
17. Be specific about that birthday present you'd like or the restaurant you want to go to. Men don't always get it when we're trying to be subtle.
18. If you find out he's done something JLO bad in the past — like cheated on an ex-girlfriend — ask him why he did it and what he learnt from it. If he's contrite and has vowed to change, chances are he won't do it again.
19. When he seems overwhelmed during an argument, take a 20-minute break. Men's bodies easily flood with stress hormones, triggering an instinct to flee.
20. Watch your mouth in moments of anger. Cruel or contemptuous comments are often forgiven but not forgotten.
21. Don't criticise his attempts to say sorry. Men apologise through activity, so although you may not hear the word, you'll see it when he takes you to dinner or gives you a hug after a fight.
THE COMFORT ZONE
22. One habit all happy couples share is doing fun things together. Competitive games, like pool or Wii, raise adrenaline, which helps you bond.
23. Jump on him, instead of next to him, on the couch.
24. Kissing him passionately for no particular reason makes you more aroused during sex, even hours later...
25. And don't forget to hug either. Guys have less oxytocin, the brain's bonding chemical, than women, but it can be boosted with frequent touch.
26. If your body's changed don't point it out! Men rarely notice details like cellulite or boob saggage.
27. Don't dump everyone to be with your partner 24/7. Space is healthy, and no one person can be responsible for your happiness.
20. Watch your mouth in moments of anger. Cruel or contemptuous comments are often forgiven but not forgotten.
21. Don't criticise his attempts to say sorry. Men apologise through activity, so although you may not hear the word, you'll see it when he takes you to dinner or gives you a hug after a fight.
THE COMFORT ZONE
22. One habit all happy couples share is doing fun things together. Competitive games, like pool or Wii, raise adrenaline, which helps you bond.
23. Jump on him, instead of next to him, on the couch.
24. Kissing him passionately for no particular reason makes you more aroused during sex, even hours later...
25. And don't forget to hug either. Guys have less oxytocin, the brain's bonding chemical, than women, but it can be boosted with frequent touch.
26. If your body's changed don't point it out! Men rarely notice details like cellulite or boob saggage.
27. Don't dump everyone to be with your partner 24/7. Space is healthy, and no one person can be responsible for your happiness.
